Menopause Ceremony

Honor what you’ve been through and where you’re going.

Half the population experiences menopause.
Why don’t more of us celebrate?

Gather your people: let’s honor your transition.

Saying goodbye to your period (so many periods!) is cause for celebration. Menopause can be a liberating mixture of clarity, joy, and relief. We feel more like ourselves, grow less tolerant of BS, and see the twinkle come back to our eyes.

A menopause ceremony is a profound and fun moment for your friends and family to honor you and your transition.

Your mom didn’t tell you about hers. It wasn’t part of health education in school. And then one day, a hot flash. It’s strange that something so common is discussed so rarely.

After years of weird and uncomfortable perimenopause effects, we reach Menopause Day and start to feel better. And what do we get for crossing over? Nothing. We glide into post-menopause with no ritual to mark the occasion.

You are worthy of ceremony.

Hello, I’m Shelley

I’m a transition coach who blabs to everyone I know about menopause. This is a resource for the many of you who are searching for menopause ceremony ideas. Have fun!

Curious about coaching for the transition you’re in? Learn about my coaching here.

Ceremony design

A moment of honor for an individual or a group

Decide whether to gather around one person who is going through menopause, or a group of people who are experiencing it together. Your call.

Basic elements

People in a room together, food, drink, stories, and a ritual of release.

Timing is up to you. You can aim for menopause day (the 12-month anniversary of your last period), or sometime after cross-over into post-menopause. Note that not all people know when they’ve reached menopause.

The evening can be fun, spiritual, serious, profound, or a mixture of all of them. The people at the center should guide the tone, as menopause can stir up a lot of big feelings. Plan with care.

Ideas: the profound elements

  • Gather, offer welcome, set a purpose

  • Opening reading, candle-lighting, or grounding moment

  • Dedication: call on ancestors or guides

  • Traditions: elements from your faith or culture

  • Facts about menopause: clearing up some myths

  • Sharing of perimenopause experience: you and your guests

  • Naming our grief: sharing what is lost

  • Setting an intention for the next phase of life

Ideas: the fun stuff

  • Menopause-themed food & treats

  • What’s great about your menopause

  • Admiration & gratitude circle

  • Music: sing, play the songs that got you through

  • Poetry & readings

  • Letting go: releasing what no longer serves you

  • The Gifting of the Tampons

  • Advice for younger people: what you wish you knew

More context on all of this, please

 

  • We’re starting to see more media coverage of menopause, and companies are popping up to sell related wellness products. What we’re missing is a communal moment; a ceremony that lets us name the physical and emotional impacts of perimenopause, express our joy for getting through and our grief for what can no longer be, and mark the beginning of our powerful next phase of life. You are worthy of a formal acknowledgment of this occasion, surrounded by the people who love you.

  • The menopause ceremony is ideal for a person who is in late perimenopause or whose menopause day is approaching.

    This ceremony is also appropriate for people who were thrown into menopause early due to chemotherapy, hormone treatments, or thyroid disorders. This includes trans men, nonbinary folks, and people in cancer treatment.

  • No, but also: sure, if you want it to be. This ceremony includes elements of ritual to revel in, honor, and release aspects of this big life transition. You can dial up the spiritual side as you’d like, or be straightforward about menopause and its indicators. It can also be a real big party. We’ll adjust the woo so it feels like you.

  • The grief and joy of menopause can stir up emotional dust. Unprocessed loss, identity questions, coping with a changing body: these topics must be handled with care. Working through them in advance will establish emotional safety for you and your guests.

    Consider talking with a therapist or coach in advance of a ceremony to work through your relationship with this transition. It can be a lot to process all of that during a party.

  • Your guests might include people of many ages and genders. The ceremony can be a fun way to lightly educate loved ones about menopause while also preparing younger folks for their own transitions. Or you can choose to invite only a small group of your closest friends. It’s your call. Either way, you’ll be getting vulnerable, so use that as a guide.

    The ceremony can work well with anywhere from 3 to 12 people. Any more than that and it gets hard to hold on to a theme. Consider appointing someone as a host or MC to keep the evening flowing.

  • Holding the ceremony in a private home is ideal - you’ll want space to move around and the ability to control the noise level. A restaurant doesn’t really work. Gathering people in person is ideal, and you can bring people in over Zoom as needed. Ask them to stay the whole time.

    Timing? Menopause is one single day: the 12-month anniversary of your last period. People who track their periods can pinpoint this date with some accuracy. Others not on a recurring cycle can choose a day and call it good. A ceremony can be tied to a lunar cycle if that feels right.

    Plan for a ceremony duration of at least 2 hours, including food and drink.

 

Did you hold a menopause ceremony? I want to know!